Today you need to get organized early in the day -- there are lots of things coming your way that you will definitely want to get involved with, and you'll have to prepare your schedule for them. Finish up your boring little tasks and big projects alike, as quickly as you possibly can. You need to create more time for the fun, creativity and exciting drama that is in store for you in your near future. Your energy is growing, and you're going to be on a roll!

Very true. I seriously have many many things to do. Let's see.

Monday (28/7) - Submission of HMC

Friday (1/8) - Cousins from KL coming down

Sunday (3/8) - Singfest! *ZOMG*

Wednesday (6/8) - Dental appointment

Friday (8/8) - High School Musical on Ice *what, the tickets were free*

Saturday (9/8) - Cousin's wedding @ JB

Sunday (10/8) - Cousin's Wedding @ JB Cont.

Tuesday (12/8) - TPSW Presentation

Saturday (16/8) - Nifsu Syaaban @ Bishan Stadium

Sunday (17/8) - Soccer with cousins @ The Cage

And the list goes on but that's all I can remember for now.

Friday

Body language.

Saturday
Wayang Kulit.

Sunday
Love.

I might have had the most worrying, scariest Friday. And my weekends might be burnt off this time. But that is okay because next week, I'll make up for loss time. Now that Charlie's coming along for sure, and the possibility of cousin being able to make it, it'll be double the fun. With our headbands and feathers, we are going to wreak havoc. Right girls? ;) Okay back to wayang kulit. Takecare babies.

I had alot to say. I guess the anxiety died off. Nonetheless, a Tuesday which caused my insides to churn slightly, shook my emotive enzymes and made me fall into deep thought for a good few hours. It's unbelievable how a few words can totally change your perception on life. Nothing is easy, you either make it or break it. If you fall, brush yourself off and try again. Because no hand will always be reaching out for you, your whole life. As harsh as it is, it's a bloody fact. And seriously, you can trust no one.

As much as the saying, "birds of a feather flock together" spells truth, no one person can be 100% similar. Every single one of our differences adds up spice/nothing nice. Can't seem to play along?

You're out.

I guess all the sentences I've constructed over the last few minutes which are now sitting on the edge of my membrane, has got to do with emotions. No, it is not that time of the month. And no, I am not suffering from hormonal imbalance. I'm just - growing up.

You might not understand where I'm going with this, but that is just because you have not heard what I have. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there. Suck it in or be sucked in; you choose.

On a much much yay finally I feel so lucky note, I got a pair of new shoes. Running shoes. Thanks to my cousin. Yes, the one who I was very angry with last year. The one who kept running me down and the one who made me cry for a straight 2 days. With every bitter experience, comes a sugary surprise. Okay I totally made that up. Whatever it is, it always works for me.

And to my dearest Malay people, please please don't further embarrass yourself? You do NOT want to hear what the others think about you. And I'm saying this as a malay, an indian, and a friend.

I love you all.

LOVE MY CNN BABIES

After sulking about 5 days of boredom, my Saturday was a blast. Woke up extra early on a Saturday which kept me grumpy for a while. Met up with Charlie & Naddy @ the school canteen. I hate it when I get tummy aches in the morning/while travelling to school. Don't you? You'll just feel like going in the train you know. Hahahahaha. Okay but no, it hasn't happened before. Also, i witnessed an unsightly scene in the train. There was this lady, who was standing in front of me (i was sitting down), then she lifted up her arm. And BAM, I saw the Amazon forest. HAHAHAHAHA. I shall allow each and everyone of your imaginations finish the story.

I'd say that the "project meeting" was ultra productive. We managed to excite ourselves, we managed to laugh at Tanjang *stares at Nadiah*, we took a hell load of pictures thanks to Charlie, we laughed at how ugly each of us were without offending the other, we shared ghost stories, we shared secrets, we almost suffered from lock jaws and my personal favourite - we had fun. Cheap, random fun.

Played soccer after that. I think I need new sport shoes. I need a sponsor. Anyone? I'll give you a kiss. ;) I want to lose 65kg before Singfest. So Jason Mraz will look at me and not blink. Hoho! Okay that sounded better in my head. Nonetheless, I think I look really cute in the first 2 pictures above. I'm adorable even when retarded. I seriously want the weekends to be extended to 3 days. We still will slog our butts off more than we rest. 7 - 3 = 4 (no. of days at sch/work) Oh my goodness I can still count. Anyhoo, see. Singapore should do something about this. 48 hours of rest/play is obviously not enough. We end up having a late night on Sunday as well and go back to school on Monday looking like zombies (some smell like them too sick i know).

*reads last paragraph* Look at the shitz I just typed. I think I've been spening too much time with Charlie. Hahahaha. Love you CNN babies! ♥

I am feeling sappy tonight. Actually, this whole week. A very mundane week. Too mundane and draggy that it caused my mind to feel rather than think. Anyways, I miss Mecca a whole lot. I miss the whole environment. I miss seeing everyone doing the same thing. It's like we were constantly mimicking each other. I miss not spending alot of time in the hotel room. I miss staying in the mosque after zohor to wait for asar/maghrib to wait for isyak. I miss looking at the Ka'bah from a distance and up-close. I miss perspiring in the heat. I miss seeing the same group of people everyday. I miss having random conversations with whoever and whenever. I miss using sign language and just smiling when someone spoke to me in arabic. Seriously, I might not have liked the constant lack of sleep, but it was all worth it. A second time, perhaps? ):

I tripped (but I didn't fall) a few times today. And it's not because I'm a klutz. I have never been one. I think my head is not where I want it to be. And this is bad, very bad. I don't even know where I'm going with this post. Oh and I had to face the armpit of a smelly nyonya this afternoon. I felt like puching her, seriously. Nonetheless, meeting Naddy & Charlie tmr morning for Saul's assignment. I have a lecturer whose name is Saul. And I think he's really cool. He wears a watch which is way to loose for him. I love his lectures best and I think he styles his hair to look like Wolverines'.

Tsk. I'm losing myself.

No one has told me, in my 16 years, that I'm insincere and "plastic". I don't know if it doesn't pay to be nice, or you're just impossible to get through to. Nonetheless, I strongly believe that I don't exist to only to please you. Also, I do not deserve this. You have no right to judge me that way. What more, you are wrong. I'm beginning to think your ego is bigger than your brain. Too many a time I've had strangers run me down. I wouldn't deny that it hurt, but I wouldn't deny that I've also completely learned how to either digest or reject comments. :)

On a lighter note, I've worked out my daily timetable. If I don't cheat and lie to myself, I think I'll be done with my assignments 2 weeks before their due dates. And I'll lose some weight as well. I am excited. I want to see how much of a hypocrite I am to myself. Huahua. Till soon. Takecare babies.

I just read this. And it is really true. Not that I'm planting every ounce of faith of mine in whatever that's said. I'm amused. Because it's very coincidental. Anyways here it is:

Ugly emotions are burbling up inside you today, and it doesn't matter why -- you're feeling out of sorts, and you need to deal with these feelings by sharing them. Be more expressive about your emotions than you typically are. For example, if you are upset with someone, don't suppress it. Don't underestimate other people by assuming they will react negatively. They have a lot more empathy than you think, and they are ready to listen. Be vulnerable and tell them how you feel.

I just got back from Sheng Siong with parents. We spent quite awhile trying to get out of the carpark. Say, 20-25minutes. This was definitely caused by the immigration. Wtfish head curry. I seriously think Singapore should go easy on the lookout for Mas Selamat. I mean really, what are the odds of him still lingering around Singapore. What are the odds of him still trying to swim across to Msia. What are the odds of him hiding in the not so foresty forests in Singapore. What are the odds of him drinking coffee at some kedai kopi reading the newspaper with his name in every article. What are the odds of him going for plastic surgery and dressing up as a lady. What are the odds of him still breathing?

ZERO TO NONE LAH.

So like let it go already. Instead of making Sg a safer place, the measures you're taking is making everyone's lives miserable. Ugh, very irritating.

Nonetheless, the best friend is back safe and sound. I've found that doing my assignments at the balcony is really much better than doing it in the room which is always full of coconut beetles. Hidayah and Zu have turned 17. Rueban turned 19 yesterday. Singfest is coming. Someone just showed me what the true meaning ignorance is. And yeah, I better stop whining about everything - because this is as good as it's gna get.

Ps: It's 125am now. I thought it was only 1230am. But that's only cs the wall clock at the balcony doesn't move on. Just like the govt. Huaaaaaaaa.

SINGFEST YO YO SINGFEST

FORGET WHATEVER I SAID IN THE PREVIOUS POST. I AM THE HAPPIEST PERSON IN WOODLANDS, AT LEAST. MY WEEK ENDED ON THE BEST NOTE EVER :D NOW I CAN'T STOP TALKING, SMILING AND LAUGHING. AS MUCH AS IT MIGHT NOT SEEM AS BIG OF A DEAL TO ALL OF YOU, IT JUST SAVED MY LUNCH AND FEET FOR THE NEXT FEW WEEKS. I LOVE MY SISTER, I LOVE MY SISTER, I LOVE MY SISTER. THIS WAS WHAT SHE SAID -

Nadia: songkok! i called ibu and she told me all the bad things that have happened to you lately. your hp, your specs being stolen. let me make it better. are you up for singfest on sunday 3rd august? i assume you would rather watch pussycat dolls, jason mraz and alicia keys than simple plan. :)

Me: hahaha she told you that. ya man, very unlucky lately. my lucky star (you) gone what. ): anyways, yes! the sunday one. why? you coming down is it. hehehe. *winkwink*

Nadia: siao i'll get the tix for you la meng. thing is i wanna make sure you have a friend to go with first. and whether ibu & daddy allow you to go. if yes then just assume that you are going on sunday for singfest.

Me: ahhhhh. seriously?! why! too much money is it kakak?!

Nadia: haha. i want my sister to be happy. if i can't be there physically at least i can still provide for her happiness in other ways. so you want to go or not?

Me: hahahahahahahaha i want i want omg omg. i wanted to save like crazy mannnnnn.

Nadia: haha. then you going with who? you don't mind going alone or what?

Me: going with a few of my classmates. planned already. hehehe. you come also ah!

Nadia: crazy. anyways, it's done. you will receive the tix by courier. it's under your name.

Me: *happy like crazy* i don't know how to thank you ah! hahahahahaha. i'm the luckiest person ever man. thank you thank you. mmmmuah! :*

Nadia: you are most welcome. take care, love you lil sis.

Me: i love you moooooooooooooooooooooooooooore kakak!

Remind me again why I love her so bloody much. Hehehehe Alhamdulillah! I'm very very happy right now. Sorry if I sound like I'm gloating. But since I share my woes with you, why not share a little of my excitement. What more, I met Siti Aishah Lubis just now. The bestestestestest friend. Then I met Farah Hanis as well. And Nisha, and Hamizah. Oh my, you cannot imagine how happy I am right now. Oh and guess what! It's Ruebs' birthday tomorrow. Wooooooots! I love you babies. ♥

I've not been in the best of moods lately. And no, it's not that time of the month. I don't know, it must be the SBS classes we've been having. Either that, or it's just how I've realised that a majority of people around me are very very ignorant. I don't know if I expect too much or they give too little. However, my gut feeling tells me it's the latter. I guess I must have come out to appear to people to be the "strong, problem-less" one. Even if that was true, would a simple "how are you" really hurt?

I am not deprived of love, attention or what have you. I have those coming from all sides. Just probably not from the right group of people. Sad, I must admit.

Then again, with so much that's been happening and will be happening, I guess this is all meant to be. A blessing in disguise, even. Because I will be too occupied to continuously listen out or comfort every single one who comes to me with problems. I need to be selfish once in a while.

In fact, I am sure more than 5 people who read this will think I'm talking about him/her. Well dear, I'm not. Because apparently, the world does not revolve around you alone. Call it coincidence. Or sheer ignorance on my part. Pfft.

3 places to be at tomorrow. Obviously I know where I want to be at. Hancock with them cousins. Why? Simple. Family always comes first. Not peers, not now. Doesn't seem to be worthy of my time. Hah.

Gosh. How I love being egotistical. ♥

we will never say goodbye

Say what you want. The only reason I uploaded this picture is cs I'm wearing my specs. Today was an alright day which ended on a note so pleasant note. I lost my spectacles. I don't know, it could still be lying around under a chair in G101. But if I was to look for it tomorrow and not find it, I'm going to hate the whole lot of you who sat behind me. Yes, I will be prejudiced and assume that one of you guys took it. It ain't funny ok because as much as I don't always have my specs on the bridge of my nose 24/7, I need it. ): I am very irritated. However I shall tell you in the next entry if I found it in the end.

I realised something. Coconut beetles are such clumsy insects. They fly around, hit something, land on their back and spend hours trying to get back on their front.

Also. I wonder why something so simple can be turned into something so complicated. As complicated as the X & Y chromosomes in someone's body. I know I might not make perfect sense right now. But that's just it. You start with A, drag in B. Fine. I can handle that. But in some sick way, you think that isn't enough of an issue. So you drag in B - F. In the end, F tells G and G informs every single person till Z. Seriously when will it end, then? Bile mau game sia?

I am very random right now. Because apparently it's 4:05am. This is how my life's been. Very unhealthy you say. That explains all the fats that are on my fats fats. Eew eh? Ohwells. That's pretty much all. Ciao! *shows back of hand*

I must I must I must

There are so many things I must do otherwise I'd be better off invisible to myself. I know that didn't just make any sense. But whatever.

1) I must must finish my assignments.

2) I must must not dream so much.

3) I must must change my specs. My degree has increased, again.

4) I must must start saving. So many exciting things are going to happen!

5) I must must get back on track - spiritually.

6) I must must lose weight. Because I think half of the time why I get tired fast is cs of the extra weight my legs have to carry.

7) I must must finish my assignments.

8) I must must meet my best friend. ♥

9) I must must improve my english.

10) I must must return my books.

By the way. I bumped into Azza today, yay!

It's a good thing to keep your hopes high, but you also have to know when it's time to admit the reality of the situation. It's time for you to get real about your chances of success and start putting your energy and thoughts toward something that's more possible -- something you have more control over. Renewal is in the air right now, so if you can just hold on and stay motivated, you will enjoy a change of tides that will sweep in a much happier era in your life.

That was definitely a slap on my face. I don't want to plant every ounce of faith within me in whatever that's said above, but I can't deny the fact that, THAT worries me. Shoot. Now I'll just be more paranoid than ever. Nonetheless, sorry for the short hiatus. Haha. I messed up the HTML codes. That is why. Till I find out what I've got to stay motivated for, takecare babies. ♥

Don't ask me why I look like that. Both of us had a long, tiresome Thursday. However thankfully, we managed to meet up. Even for awhile. And although we were rushing throughout, we had a really good mini escapade. Huahua. From gossiping, to complaining about trivial issues which happens in lecture theatres, to a bumpy bus ride, to a grumpy bus driver, to a guy named Jonathan, to the glow-in-the-dark slippers, to reminiscing, to writing amongst ants, to hoping we make it, to waiting for a bus, to taking pictures while waiting for the bus.

Syu, remember okay. A car first, then a boyfriend. Hahaha! However if things change, then don't use this against one another. Hehe. I will call you on Friday nights for roti prata at Jalan Kayu. And teh tarik at Al-Ameen. And for petrol at Johor Bahru. And slacking at Singgah Selalu. Thank you for accompanying me just now! Love you Syugar ♥

Nonetheless, back to reality. Apart from Syu, the only other thing that definitely make me smile from ear to ear was when Jailani showed us videos. With Shah Rukh Khan in it! Woot woot. I got so excited, Matt Bindhi had to pay for it. Ok anyways. Loads of things to complete. In fact I feel that 1 day is no longer 24hours. It's been cut down to 10 or something. I dislike the fact that my life revolves around travelling to school, pushing my way through crowds, wasting my time away waiting for the bloody 911, giving the aunty $2.20 everyday for green tea and clorets, worrying about how much I have left in my ez-link. And this is everyday okay! In fact, if all goes well, this will go on for what, 3 more years? *faints*

Pardon the apples. This is as good as it's going to get.